Post by gameplaya2435 on Aug 2, 2008 12:29:12 GMT -5
This is a simple concept. I’ll be reviewing the Season 8 Draft to see just who exactly, in my opinion, fails and wins. Try to keep up.
Round 1:
1. Dickshot Unabomber – QB: Cougars
Status: Win
Though his name is uberfail, TesT is win. Despite his beastiality, run ins with the law, and lack of cojones, he will quickly max out at the easiest fucking position there is in the game. Too bad he’s stuck on the Cougars, who wouldn’t know win if it slapped them across the face.
2. Zach Zorow – WR: Rolling Thunder
Status: Fail
No question that “Zorow” is fail. For one, he is part of the Dorow Brothers. He also has fucking retarded name. Finally, he is part of the ISL crowd. Three strikes equals fail fail fail.
3. Kayne Leionidas – WR: Wolfpack
Status: Fail
Maybe if he could spell Leonidas right, he wouldn’t be so fail. Instead he is just another one of the long line of fail receivers who thinks their shit don’t stink.
4. Thomas “Pepper” Jackson – LB: Blitz
Status: Win
TPJ is definitely a win. He is a team player, he’s fucking hilarious, and he wields a mallet that’s almost as big as he is.
5. Ferrari Manning – QB: Wolfpack
Status: Fail
Roflfail. Maybe if he knew how to do a point task, could type with any shred of evidence of grammar, or was consistently around, he wouldn’t be so fail.
6. Terry Tate – LB: Stars
Status: Fail
If it wasn’t proven by Bruce Lee, Joe Jackson, or Billy Bob Williams, Terry Tate is an inactive who will flake out in a few weeks or so. Probably sooner.
Round 2:
1. Justin Heranus – LB: Cougars
Status: Fail
As seen by former player Sucka Cock, Heranus is an inactive who will occasionally pop up during fantasy season. Though this name is a little bit more creative, he is still fail.
2. Mike Lowry – RB: Cougars
Status: Fail
Watchthis is almost the definition of fail. He has gone AWOL recently, hasn’t done a point task in ages, and will bitch if things don’t go his way, with a history of cheating. IN addition, he goes to the failest team around in the Cougars, who don’t have a spot for him yet drafted him anyway. Fails all around.
3. Ken Welker – FB: Wolfpack
Status: Fail
Fails all over the place. I don’t think Sady has done a point task in his life. The only reason his last player was any good is because he racked up the performance points by building a shitty team with shitty players around him. That won’t work on the offensive side of the ball, however. This shitty team will be the one getting the ball jammed down their throats, and Welker won’t be able to rack up the benefits.
4. Alex Lewis VI – FB: Blitz
Status: Win
Obviously win. Did you expect anything else? ALVI goes into a tremendously win situation as well as the running back on a new up and coming team.
5. I Got A Raging Clue – TE: Lumberjax
Status: Win
My clue’s pointed his way. And his way is win.
6. Markus Mudkips – WR: Blitz
Status: Win
I herd u liek him. It’s ok, I liek him too. Whether it be e-stalking, pwning n00bs, or mounting TesT’s pooch, Mudkips is the definition of win.
Round 1:
1. Dickshot Unabomber – QB: Cougars
Status: Win
Though his name is uberfail, TesT is win. Despite his beastiality, run ins with the law, and lack of cojones, he will quickly max out at the easiest fucking position there is in the game. Too bad he’s stuck on the Cougars, who wouldn’t know win if it slapped them across the face.
2. Zach Zorow – WR: Rolling Thunder
Status: Fail
No question that “Zorow” is fail. For one, he is part of the Dorow Brothers. He also has fucking retarded name. Finally, he is part of the ISL crowd. Three strikes equals fail fail fail.
3. Kayne Leionidas – WR: Wolfpack
Status: Fail
Maybe if he could spell Leonidas right, he wouldn’t be so fail. Instead he is just another one of the long line of fail receivers who thinks their shit don’t stink.
4. Thomas “Pepper” Jackson – LB: Blitz
Status: Win
TPJ is definitely a win. He is a team player, he’s fucking hilarious, and he wields a mallet that’s almost as big as he is.
5. Ferrari Manning – QB: Wolfpack
Status: Fail
Roflfail. Maybe if he knew how to do a point task, could type with any shred of evidence of grammar, or was consistently around, he wouldn’t be so fail.
6. Terry Tate – LB: Stars
Status: Fail
If it wasn’t proven by Bruce Lee, Joe Jackson, or Billy Bob Williams, Terry Tate is an inactive who will flake out in a few weeks or so. Probably sooner.
Round 2:
1. Justin Heranus – LB: Cougars
Status: Fail
As seen by former player Sucka Cock, Heranus is an inactive who will occasionally pop up during fantasy season. Though this name is a little bit more creative, he is still fail.
2. Mike Lowry – RB: Cougars
Status: Fail
Watchthis is almost the definition of fail. He has gone AWOL recently, hasn’t done a point task in ages, and will bitch if things don’t go his way, with a history of cheating. IN addition, he goes to the failest team around in the Cougars, who don’t have a spot for him yet drafted him anyway. Fails all around.
3. Ken Welker – FB: Wolfpack
Status: Fail
Fails all over the place. I don’t think Sady has done a point task in his life. The only reason his last player was any good is because he racked up the performance points by building a shitty team with shitty players around him. That won’t work on the offensive side of the ball, however. This shitty team will be the one getting the ball jammed down their throats, and Welker won’t be able to rack up the benefits.
4. Alex Lewis VI – FB: Blitz
Status: Win
Obviously win. Did you expect anything else? ALVI goes into a tremendously win situation as well as the running back on a new up and coming team.
5. I Got A Raging Clue – TE: Lumberjax
Status: Win
My clue’s pointed his way. And his way is win.
6. Markus Mudkips – WR: Blitz
Status: Win
I herd u liek him. It’s ok, I liek him too. Whether it be e-stalking, pwning n00bs, or mounting TesT’s pooch, Mudkips is the definition of win.
